The Legacy of Abandonment In Borderline Personality Disorder

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Central to Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is abandonment. The unresolved abandonment trauma of what is a central core wound of abandonment. This abandonment wound, according to author and life coach, and BPD Coach, A.J. Mahari, who recovered from BPD 15 years ago, is the legacy that must be understood and examined in order to get on the road to recovery and to recover. Abandonment trauma arrests emotional development. The legacy of this arrested emotional development for those diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder means that they are living emotionally and psychologically profoundly painful lives. Lives that involve an unstable sense of self, intense and frequent anger or rage, and a seemingly never-ending fear of abandonment.

This ebook presents a thorough examination and explanation of the core wound of abandonment in BPD. It is the second ebook in a series of 5 exploring various aspects of what A.J. has termed the “core wound of abandonment” that she identified in her journey of recovery as the wound that is central to what BPD actually is and how and why it persists.

The Legacy of Abandonment in Borderline Personality Disorder

This ebook, available now, includes 7 chapters of must read revelation about the intricate and complicated nature of the core wound of abandonment, that is the root-cause of the emotional and relational devastation of Borderline Personality Disorder.

In this comprehensive ebook, A.J. Mahari outlines the definition, scope, and meaning of the core wound of abandonment. She describes it as the central wound that drives the emotional and relational devastation experienced by those with BPD, those who treat them, and those who care about and/or love them.

The anatomy of the core wound of abandonment is examined and explained. Along with her own experience of abandonment and her ruptured relationship with her own mother, Mahari has written an unbelievably detailed and insightful examination and explanation of the core wound of abandonment. A.J. Mahari offers her readers, in this ebook, a detailed look at how and why the core wound of abandonment is so destructive to those with BPD and everyone who gets anywhere near them relationally. Mahari writes that the destruction of the core wound of abandonment leads directly to the loss of self – a loss of authentic self that creates the false self organization of Borderline Personality Disorder. She also offers solutions and maps out the things that every borderline needs to learn if they want to recover, as A.J. has. Mahari shares the steps that she had to take, the pitfalls that block change and the awareness required to get on and stay on the road of and to recovery.

Whether you have BPD or are in (have been in)a relationship (friend, family member, significant other, ex-partner) with someone with Borderline Personality Disorder, as well as any professional treating someone with BPD will benefit from the insight A.J. Mahari shares from her own borderline experience, and her journey to her recovery from BPD.

Along with much more, A.J. outlines the following in this ebook:

  • 17 Major ways that the issues that stem directly from the core wound of abandonment devastate the borderline’s every attempt to relate and what it is that those with BPD do that is counter-productive and pathological in terms of the way they attempt to relate to self and to others
  • 13 common occurrences in the triggered cycle of borderline dissociative, regression when triggered
  • 35 ways to facilitate grounding when the borderline is triggered
  • 30 Points of Awareness needed to integrate abandonment fear
  • 5 key things at the heart of the integration of abandonment fear and abandonment pain
  • 12 commitments needed for the borderline to begin opening up to and learning to tolerate his/her pain
  • 20 Awareness Points needed to learn how to soothe yourself
  • 20 Key ways to soothe yourself
  • 10 Keys to Unwinding the Legacy of the Core Wound of Abandonment that make it possible for someone with
  • BPD to transform the devastation of pathological relating and learn how to relate more successfully
  • The 5 Roadblocks, among them Negative Core Beliefs
  • 10 examples of negative core beliefs
  • 10 main ways that negative core beliefs are relationally destructive unrealistic expectations
    that generate chaotic manipulative relating by those with BPD and that hinder or block recovery
  • Toxic Shame
  • Guilt
  • What recovery entails
  • Along with 6 steps in authentic self reclamation


You can read an excerpt and purchase this ebook at:


© A.J. Mahari – All rights reserved.

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